The Dojin Roku

What Am I?

2012-02-01T10:36:00.000-08:00

Always present,
But hidden from view;
Sought by many,
But found by few.

Zen Outreach in Kenya

2012-01-22T07:37:00.000-08:00

I would like to reignite a discussion I started a long time ago. It concerns the degree to which Zen should or should not be an evangelising religion. (Let's just call it a religion for now - one variable at a time, please!)

I have just completed a weekend near Lake Victoria, Kenya, haivng been invited by Spencer (pictured below)

to assist in a Zen teaching session, right in the middle of nowhere. It was a somewhat "samurai" experience as, this being something of a blind date, I was invited as much to bring along my machete as my satori. Fortunately the natives were friendly and so the steel stayed sheathed.

We appear to have been invited on account of a perceived inability of Christianity to keep its promises. I'm not agreeing or disagreeing, merely reporting that our host who has formed the Zen group pictured, having until recently been a Christian preacher, said, "The Pentecostalists said there would be miracles, so people came and prayed for miracles - but I never saw a single one!"

Thus he investigated an alternative and asked Spencer, who facilitates "Zen Kenya," to provide instruction. He only discovered that such tuition was available because Zen Kenya had gone to the trouble of making its existence and teaching role known.

My point is that if Zen Kenya had been terribly Zen, terribly self-effacing, then the excellent practice of anapanasati, as very clearly taught by Spencer, would be a gift ungiven - and the Africans pictured would be bereft of something beautiful.

I'm not saying we should copy Jehova's team (put on a suit, grab a child, go ringing doorbells.)

However, I feel we are breaking our Bodhisattva vows if we do not quietly and respectfully use all skillful means available to make the practice and fruits of meditation available to as many people as possible.

One year in the OBW

2011-12-18T22:18:00.000-08:00

One year ordained and I've already killed the teacher

It's been a year now since I was ordained in the OBW. The first months I tried to figure out what it meant and what I was going to do about it. People asked me if I was going to start a group or begin teaching in some way or other.

For some (most "zen" people) it was very difficult to understand that I wasn't a teacher until a student would recognize me as such. There was even one zenmonk that asked me how I should be "treated", throwing away with one question all her years of practice.

I didn't start any group, nor am I going to do it in the future. The fact is that I'm no teacher at all, I don't feel like one. What I do have been doing is writing with friends, sometimes meeting and talking. And this is something I consider very important, to have the oportunity of sharing a path and a practice that for me is the most important in this life.

It is in this sharing that the teacher can appear, only when we both are the students. As long as we can listen and give us to that listening, the teacher has a chance. Otherwise is just a name, a title, an empty word.

The breath, my other teacher

During this year I've also turned back to the practice on the breath. Doing an active work on it, one can easily find ease, comfort, joy and pleasure in sitting meditation, allowing so for longer meditation periods and a mind that is more receptive to explore body, feelings and ideas as they present themselves.

I know, many of you won't be happy to hear this, being so fond of non-doing. But I firmly believe in the process of construction that meditation is (one day I may explore how much construction is there in "emptiness", "non-doing" and "egolessness"). Maybe a quote of mister Gotama can help me here: "The path to freedom is a path of development and letting go"

Ending the year on retreat

Soon I'll be on my anual solitary retreat; think of me when you're celebrating Christmas, because I'll be doing jhana. This is the third year I'm allowed to do it in the same house, so it's turning a tradition now.

Finally, just let you know that my blog do jhana is back on track.

Whishing you all a peacefull end of the year.

Gassho

Ordination Poem

2011-12-09T10:36:00.000-08:00

Ordination Poem
by
Jikai Seido
7/23/2011

The drum beats slowly,
My heart beats quickly.
Three of us in procession.
The red cedars sway above.
Sunbeams light the way.

We rest in each step.
The hushed, small zendo
Sits tucked tightly in its
Shaded bower.

The windows have been removed:
Who knows where the inside
And the outside begins and ends?

We take our seats.
Warm honey light
Fills this tiny space.

Friends and family peer
Inside through the spaces
Where the windows had been.
Zen fishbowl.

The hot, sweet breath of
Northwest summer forest
Wafts inside,
Carrying softly the words
Of our teacher,
Into our hearts.

We are given our
Bowl, staff, and dharma name.
The forest trills with birdsong.

This moment will stand forever.
And someday, when we
Three dojin, teacher, and sangha
Are long gone.
Ferns and nurse logs will cover
the path we once took.

The vows taken here today,
Now, in this moment,
Will live here in zazen,
Buried in the seeds and carried
By the wind.

No Path

2011-12-05T19:24:00.000-08:00

Yesterday a student suggested that Zen might be a path towards a "coma-like state". This was an interesting observation - and considering the way Zen can be used, perhaps in some cases his description was right!

This got me thinking about the Heart Sutra and why, for me, it is more liberation than lobotomy. I came upon the term, "No path." Zen is about living in the present moment. If you are walking "No path" then every step of the way you are expressing a preference. Forwards? Backwards? Sideways? Stop? With no path to follow, you choose.

The rest of Zen is just a support mechanism for ensuring that every step of the way we really do express a preference, and not just get jerked around by cravings.

The 100 foot pole.

2011-08-08T21:44:00.000-07:00

I don't particularly care to give Dharma talks. I find that the truth one finds in silence to be truer than any words that can be spoken. I have often thought it is better for one to teach by example but for many our examples are misunderstood. But how do we explain truth in words? Truth is just some idea in our mind not something that we can grasp hold of. In this sense there is no truth.

But still we want to know what truth is. So we try to explain in words and by doing so there is no end to the discussion. Soon we may realize that there is nothing we can say that will explain truth. In essence all off our words fall short, they become vulgar and seem only to hide that which truly exists. So what can we say or do to explain truth? Nothing!

Master Sekiso said, "You are at the top of a 100 foot pole. How will you make a step further? This would seem an impossible feat, for if one would take a step forward one would surly die. Nor can we step back. This seems to be an impossible place with nowhere to return to and nowhere to go.

We many become comfortable on top of the 100 foot pole, thinking that we can see everything so much clearer, and that now we understand truth, we may even think this is enlightenment. But it is not enlightenment. For what is there to understand? And what is there to see? As the impossibility of our situation returns we may start to contemplate life and after we use all the words we can find to verify life we find there is really nothing that explains it. Like truth the only answers for life are found in silence.

Standing on top of the 100 foot pole we will experience this silence. But the experience may go unnoticed or be short lived because of our leaning minds. So how can we know truth? We have to take one step forward. We have step into the silence, we have to fall from the pole. How can anyone take such a step? We may start to contemplate death, only to find, like truth and life, there are no words that can give death true meaning. We find only that truth, life and death are nothing in particular. Just the thusness of what is. With this realization stepping off the 100 foot pole becomes less of an impossibility and more of a necessity.

Mumon commented on the 100 foot pole. He said "Should there be any who is able to step forward from the top of the 100 foot pole and hurl one’s whole body into the entire universe, this person may call oneself a Buddha. Nevertheless, how can one step forward from the top of the 100 foot pole? Know thyself!

Should one be content and settle on top of the 100,000 foot pole, One will harm the third eye, And will even misread the marks on the scale. Should one throw oneself and be able to renounce one’s life, Like one blind person leading all other blind persons, One will be in absolute freedom (unattached from the eyes)".

It's so simple that a child could do it . . .

2011-07-14T10:39:00.000-07:00

I don't remember much about the fifth grade. Oh, I remember a few faces, what the school looked like, and other such inane details, but I don't remember specifically what I learned that year. All of my elementary school years kind of blend together in that regard. However, there is one lesson in particular that I do remember from that year that has always stuck with me. Of course, it had nothing to do with the official curriculum, but the important teachings in life rarely do. I recall my teacher talking to the class one day about how he had been visiting with a friend of his, who happened to be a kindergarten teacher. His friend was grading a test that the kindergarteners had taken, which amused my teacher. "A test?" he scoffed. "What kind of test could you give to kids that age?" His friend laughed at this and told him that it was a test that the kindergarten students generally did very well at, but that most adults failed. Intrigued, my teacher decided to take the test himself, and proceeded to do quite poorly. The test, he told us later, was a simple bit of color identification. He had failed by labeling ‘yellow-green', ‘maroon', and ‘sky-blue' to what were quite simply green, red, and blue. His friend told him that the problem with adults is that they over-complicate matters. In essence, they've lost the ‘beginner's mind' of which Suzuki Roshi spoke.

Many years later, another teacher of mind put it a little differently when talking about what it takes to be a Buddhist. "It's not so much a matter of what you do", he said, "but what you don't do. Don't do the things that hurt yourself and others. Simply identify these things, and stop doing them. Stop causing suffering". The Buddha himself taught essentially the same thing. Sickness, death, and old age are universal conditions - all of us experience the first two, and many of us the latter, so in this regard, we may consider that some level of suffering is unavoidable. But how we react to and deal with these things, whether we dwell on them and how much - this is suffering that we cause ourselves. This is the suffering that the Buddha taught us that we can be free of. "It hurts when I think about death" or "when I poke my eye with my finger" . . . so stop doing that! Stop over-complicating matters, look at the simple basis of the suffering, and stop doing it. Sometimes it really is that simple.

With these things in mind, here is a look at the five lay precepts of Buddhism.

Precept 1: "We don't hit" or "I take up the practice of not harming living beings"

Every child is taught this basic concept, that it's not nice to hit other people (or push, kick, pinch, etc). As adults, we expand this to the idea of not killing other people. And what is killing, other than just hitting a little too hard? Many Buddhists further expand this notion to the idea of not killing other animal life-forms. This is a very human thing to do, to want to expand our morality to include those things that we can anthropomorphically identify with. This usually includes any creature with which we can see that we share a common physical trait, like eyes, legs, or an ability to feel pain. What we have to realize, though, is that everything that lives does so at the expense of another life form. Everything that lives lives because something else died, whether or not it killed that something else directly. We often ignore this fact, or justify it through the fine art of rationalization, or "deferred karma". "I can eat plants because they feel no pain". "I can eat this cow because I did not kill it myself" and so on. Ultimately, it comes down to individual choice. We must choose where we draw the line, and live with the consequences of our choice. As a starting point, we can be grateful for the living things that died that we may live, and we can do our best not to cause excess suffering to those things before they die. In other words, if you have to kill the chicken for food, don't make it live in squalor or beat it up before you do. Don't hit.

Precept 2: "Share what's yours and don't take what's not" or "I will not take what is not offered"

"Don't take things that don't belong to you", we tell our children. Then we advise them to take the high road, and "share your things with others". Why do we forget this as adults? Why are we so willing to steal and so unwilling to share? Well, we know how much hard work went into acquiring something, so we become attached to the idea that we earned it, and someone else should have to go through what we did to earn it - they shouldn't just get it for free from us. On the flip side, we may use the reverse argument as justification for stealing - "It would be too much work to make my own pie, but here's one already made sitting on this windowsill . . ." To further complicate matters, as adults, we recognize that there are intangible things that can be taken from others, too, like their time, their spirits (the ‘wind from their sails' if you will), their affections, and so on. When we simplify matters, though, we see that there are very few things that we actually need: air, food, water, protection from the elements, love. There is more than enough of all of these available for everyone, if we can avoid being stingy. If we can recognize that we have enough, not only will we be more willing to share what we don't need (and maybe even what we do need, as a mother will feed her child before herself), but we will feel less inclined to take what is not offered, simply because we know we don't need it. A good place to start is to practice being generous. The more you share, the easier it gets. Don't take your neighbor's pie - bring him some ice cream to go with it. Share.

Precept 3: "Don't touch others' private parts" or "I will not misuse sex"

This simple edict is about as far as young children get into the realm of sexuality, but it really is enough. Even with more advanced concepts, like sexual/emotional blackmail, this precept can really be seen as an extension of the previous one. Don't take (or touch) what is not offered and don't withhold what has been offered (share). Don't make unwelcome advances, don't withhold sex from a partner to get what you want from them, and above all, don't touch others' private parts without their permission.

Precept 4: "Don't lie, and if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all" or "I will practice gentle, truthful speech."

The basic idea here, of course, is to tell the truth and don't say anything mean. As kids, we are taught this to avoid hurting other people's feelings. As adults, we deliberately ignore this so that we can hurt or manipulate other people's feelings, whether because we really just want to hurt somebody out of a sense of retribution (after all, he called me a name/cut me off in traffic/stole my girlfriend) or because we want somebody to do something they wouldn't if we told them the truth (see Precept 3, for example). I don't deny the argument that sometimes lying can be the right thing to do ("No Herr Hitler, there are no Jews in this house" for instance), nor do I disregard the truth in the statement that "Truth is in the eye of the beholder". What's important to remember, though, is the intention of the speaker, and that the listener might not perceive the same intention. Is the intention to hurt somebody, or to help them? Furthermore, is it necessary, or can the same result be achieved through gentle, truthful means? Though you may find it necessary, for instance, to warn a potential student that the teacher they're seeking is abusive (or fraudulent, or manipulative, or . . .), remember that the good intention is to help the student, not to defame the teacher. Don't exaggerate unnecessarily (don't lie), and remember that even the most well-intentioned gentle words can be seen as a twisted lie from the other person's point of view. So, when at all possible, don't lie and don't use harsh words. The more you practice this, the easier it gets, and the more you'll recognize how much it really is unnecessary to bend or distort the truth. Then, when these complex situations come up (and they will), it may be easier to simplify the situation. Maybe it really will be as simple as holding your tongue and not saying anything at all.

Precept 5: "Don't eat that - it's bad for you" or "I will not deal in nor misuse intoxicants"

For the most part, we say this to kids because they really don't know that what they're about to eat, drink, or touch will hurt them. As adults, though, the ideas of over-complication and willful ignorance rear their heads yet again. We like the (all-too) temporary good feeling we get from intoxication, whether it's from alcohol, drugs, power, love, sex (or many, many more), and we like to ignore the effects this has on ourselves and others, both at the time of intoxication and afterward. If the idea of Buddhist meditation is to help calm or clear the mind to identify and reduce the roots of our suffering, intoxication (or clouding of the mind) is the antithesis of our practice, and it leads so readily into breaking the other four precepts in one fell swoop. So stop inviting intoxicants into your life. Get that horrible thing out of your mouth!

So, return to your Beginner's Mind. Simplify. Remember the Golden Rule - "Do not do unto others as you would not have done unto yourself". In fact, do not do unto yourself as you would not have done unto yourself. It's so simple that even a child can do it. As Robert Fulghum said, "Everything I need to know, I learned in kindergarten" (or maybe fifth grade, if you're a slow learner . . .)

Shared Teachings

2011-07-06T14:38:00.000-07:00

It has been a while since our last posting and I would like to take this opportunity to suggest that we switch gears and try a fresh approach to our postings. According to blog descriptor- The Dojin Roku, is a collection of thoughts, observations and shared teachings as presented by the Dojin, or Wayfarers, of the Boundless Mind Zen School.

So with this in mind, I would like to propose that the next series of postings be shared teachings and written like Dharma Talks, whereby each post is a teaching as understood and presented by the individual as a lesson to be shared with the readership. Any comments by readers should likewise be treated like comments, or follow up questions that one would respectfully give or ask after hearing a Dharma talk.

Let’s see where this takes us.

It's your move...

Zen versus Ch'an

2011-05-05T12:17:00.000-07:00

I have known a number of Zen teachers/authors who claim that there is a difference between Chinese Ch’an and Japanese Zen, and say that the two are not the same. Is this because one person says “to-may-to” and the other “to-ma-to” or are Zen and Chan actually different?

Reality

2011-04-25T11:57:00.000-07:00

"Reality is an illusion brought on by lack of alcohol." Discuss.

(You may consider "alcohol" a metaphor, if you wish.)

Oneness!

2011-04-11T02:59:00.000-07:00

Yesterday heading home after retreat, standing on a ferry between the two shores, I felt the pleasure of silence, of practice: sitting meditation, walking meditation, cooking and drinking coffee meditation. There in the ferry I saw how important it is, how much we have to do of it; a clear insight that dismantles the argument of those practitioners who explain their lazyness by saying that ”just being” is enough, or ”being natural” or ”mindfull”. This is not so.

One should sit for aeons in order to have a glimpse of what is not bound by views and practices. Moreover, one should walk for aeons, should stand, should lie down, should sweep the floor, wash the dishes, clean the toilet for a million kalpas in order to realize that practice and life are not different.

Half an hour, won't do.

20 years won't do.

Smart answers won't do either.

Will that turn you into a statue? Those who think this spend more time imagining what sitting meditation is than actually sitting in meditation, while those who sit for kalpas are the ones who walk, stand, sweep and wash for kalpas. Imagining what sitting meditation is, is being a statue (a stone with unmovable views); sitting in meditation is discoverying the constant flow, essenceless and change of every breath, thought, action, view...

The ferry, the sun is shining, spring is welcome and the same sea that two days ago wanted to eat me with its brave waves is in calm today, sparkling, throwing stars, playing with the sun.

I'm in peace, dancing peace, at ease and refreshed as if I had slept for thousand years. I love and kiss with tonge that light-play between the sea, the sky and the sun.

Then, as a fish jumping out of the water, a question arises: ”Oneness, oneness, where is oneness?” And I search for it with the mind-eye, with an open heart, confident in the practice, resting in this peace. I look, I see the sea north and south and the plain and dizzy coast east and west. I look but I don't see this oneness. I scan perception, what is seen, what is heard, what is felt and thought... and I can't find it.

This beauty, this magic moment and yet without oneness?

Wonderfull! Then I know I'm free.

Just like those who don't practice buddhism & zen are bound by their sense of separation, the sickness that is consuming zenbuddhists is that of emptiness, no self and oneness. It made us vomit blood and flowers (and worse things).

In those inspiring moments I could only think of two words to express my insight. Just imagine the setting up: a sunny day, the deck of an old ferry boat, the fresh wind, the taste of meditation, the two words:

Fuck Oneness

In awe, I bow.

Compassion

2011-03-30T03:37:00.000-07:00

I'm struggling with the notion of "compassion" at the moment. It is said that compassion should arise naturally from enlightenment. Why?

I understand that a sense of no-self will create a sense of unity with all sentient life - no problem there. But why should one then feel compassion for it all? Why that particular emotion?

Za-zen Buddhism?

2011-03-24T19:48:00.000-07:00

“The history of Chinese Zen raises one problem of great fascination. Both Rinzai and Soto Zen as we find them in Japanese monasteries today put enormous emphasis on za-zen or sitting meditation . . . We have already mentioned the incident between Ma-tsu and Huai-jang, in which the latter compared sitting in meditation to polishing a tile for a mirror. On another occasion Huai-Jang said:

To train yourself in sitting meditation [za-zen] is to train yourself to be a sitting Buddha. If you train yourself in za-zen, (you should know that) Zen is neither sitting nor lying. If you train yourself to be a sitting Buddha, (you should know that) the Buddha is not a fixed form. Since the Dharma has no (fixed) abode, it is not a matter of making choices. If you (make yourself) a sitting Buddha this is precisely killing the Buddha. If you adhere to the sitting position, you will not attain the principle (of Zen).

This seems to be the consistent doctrine of all the T’ang masters from Hui-neng to Lin-chi. Nowhere in their teachings have I been able to find any instruction in or recommendation of the type of za-zen which is today the principal occupation of Zen monks. On the contrary, the practice is discussed time after time in the apparently negative fashion of the two quotations just cited . . . Perhaps, then, the exaggeration of za-zen in later times is part and parcel of the conversion of the Zen monastery into a boys’ training school. To have them sit still for hours on end under the watchful eyes of monitors with sticks is certainly a sure method of keeping them out of mischief.”

From The Way of Zen, by Alan Watts

Zen is a collection of practices and teachings that help us remember who we really are and how we naturally fit into the infinitely complex and miraculously simple web of existence. Zen aims to do this, as its very name implies, through the practice of meditation. And though it can be any activity, we have, by and large, come to think of meditation almost exclusively as a seated practice (aided, no doubt, by the Japanese addition of the prefix za-, meaning seated or sitting.) In this way, we limit ourselves. Learning to be a sitting Buddha is only useful to the extent that it helps us to become a walking Buddha, an eating Buddha, a sleeping Buddha, and so on and on to everything that we do. If we never move beyond the sitting, we are as children that have never learned to walk, even convincing ourselves that walking is unnecessary – “there is only sitting”.

Why would we do this to ourselves? Is it ignorance? Is it a method of control? Is Alan Watts right – are we merely wayward children that can do no more than hope to be kept out of mischief?

Hakuin

2011-03-03T08:34:00.000-08:00

"Once, after I (Hakuin) had set forth my understanding to the master (Etan Zosu) during dokusan, he said to me, 'Commitment to the study of Zen must be genuine. How do you understand the koan about the dog and Buddha-nature?'
'No way to lay a hand or foot on that,' I replied.
He abruptly reached out and caught my nose. Giving it a sharp push with his hand, he said, 'Got a pretty good hand on it there!' "

Some people use shock therapy to transmit dharma; others feel placid serenity is more the trademark of one ready to share enlightened understanding. Participants in this blog cover the full range. In fact, I've had the Dojin Roku representative of each extreme sitting here in sangha at the same sesshin!

Which approach do you find most awakening - the warm smile or the bucket of icy water?

Effort is Superfluous

2011-03-01T15:15:00.000-08:00

Once true-nature is recognized, one can harmonize with one’s environment yet remain undefiled. This is to already be a Buddha. At this point there is no need to put forth effort and be diligent. Any action is superfluous. No need to bother with the slightest thought or word. Therefore, to become a Buddha is the easiest, most unobstructed task. Do it by yourself. Do not seek outside yourself for it.

Hsu Yun

Buddhism

2011-02-20T05:29:00.000-08:00

Today a friend came for our regular Sunday sitting. She asked what I'd been doing since last weekend. I replied that the most exciting event had been on Wednesday, when I'd fulfilled an invitation to spend 15 minutes explaining Buddhism to 400 teenagers.
"What did you say to them?" she asked.
"I spent 12 minutes explaining why and how to do anapanasati. Then we all meditated for three minutes."
"That's not Buddhism," she commented.

What do you think?

Past Lives?

2011-02-07T11:58:00.000-08:00

I am told by many of my Buddhist friends that our current situation is results of the accumulation of our Karma from past lives.

What “past lives” are they referring too?

If Zen Buddhists say there is “No Self” who is there to have past lives?

Can anyone explain this?

Listen!

2011-01-27T13:34:00.000-08:00

Sitting, listening to the speech of Huike.

I come now here and write it down

Are you a Bodhisattva?

2011-01-25T03:28:00.000-08:00

"If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem."

So, Third World hunger. How would a modern Bodhisattva be part of the solution?

Popular Delusions

2011-01-06T11:14:00.000-08:00

"Men, it has been well said, think in herds; it will be seen that they go mad in herds, while they only recover their senses slowly, one by one."

Why do otherwise intelligent individuals form seething masses of idiocy when they engage in collective action? Why do financially sensible people jump lemming-like into hare-brained speculative frenzies--only to jump broker-like out of windows when their fantasies dissolve? How do men of letters become religious fanatics, when faced with contradictory facts and reason? (Charles MacKay, Author of- Extraordinary Popular Delusions and the Madness of Crowds)

Corporate delusions are the most blinding of all. Whenever a given group begins thinking collectively, the collective consciousness becomes and entity of its own, a Hungry Ghost with its own corporate delusions; delusions of power, delusions of authority, delusions of self righteousness.

How can we find truth, when those we consider the authorities are among the deluded masses? Where is our awakening to be found?

“…Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. Do not believe anything because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything because it is written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and the benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it."
-the Kalama Sutra

Nothing is Hidden!

2011-01-01T14:02:00.001-08:00

A student once asked Ts' ui-wei “What is the real meaning of Buddhism?” Ts' ui-wei answered: "Wait until there is no one around and I will tell you." Later that evening the monk again approached him and said, "There is nobody here now. Please tell me, what is the real meaning of Buddhism?" Ts'ui-wei led him into the garden and went over to some bamboo and pointed. "Here is a tall bamboo; there is a short one!"

A fundamental tenet of Zen is that there are no hidden teachings. Everything is free and presented openly. Within these open teachings lie both the esoteric and exoteric teachings, only the student's understanding separates one from the other. Anyone who claims that there are hidden teachings beyond this, knows nothing of Zen.

Nothing is hidden!

A Zen Christmas Carol

2010-12-25T12:15:00.000-08:00

Oh, the ego inside is frightful,
It can makes us mean and spiteful,
If True Nature you wish to know,
Let it go! Let it go! Let it go!

Happy Holidays!

Winter retreat

2010-12-20T12:30:00.000-08:00

I'll be on retreat from Wednesday to Tuesday. Being alone is always a test for one self-confidence, especially on these days, when one gets the message that one should be in company of others, having fun and being compassionate. Even my 7 year old daughter is beginning to challenge my decision of going in solitude. She too feels the pressure.

Maybe you think I'm being selfish, but I'm only acting without further hesitation in order to face affliction. Maybe my "selfishness" today is a way of showing that it is possible to live in such a way as not to be confused by others, so the teacher teaches without being bound to better answers and transmission is realized, the one that was not invented.

My stuff and bowl are ready. So is my cushion.

For those of you who will be celebrating, it is also there.

Gassho

Confused by Others

2010-12-19T19:49:00.000-08:00

I was contacted by a student of Zen who was greatly confused by a conversation with another Zen teacher. This other teacher told him that because he lacked sufficient training, that he could not be enlightened. The student asked me if I thought this was correct. To which I replied, “Yes, he was correct.”
“How can he make this judgment, he doesn’t even know me?”
“Apparently he does, or you wouldn’t be telling me this.” I affirmed.
“Why do you agree with him?
“Because you did.”
“I didn’t agree! I was insulted!” he argued.
“And, that’s what made him correct.”

“What I point out to you is only that you shouldn't allow yourselves to be confused by others. Act when you need to, without further hesitation or doubt. People today can't do this—what is their affliction? Their affliction is in their lack of self-confidence.”
–Lin Chi

So, what’s your excuse?

Perspective

2010-12-15T19:27:00.000-08:00

I've just come across a photo which I thought I'd share. It's helping me not to attach excessive importance to things - a sort of visual "Mu!" Here it is:

Build at hut

2010-12-15T06:14:00.000-08:00

Sometimes we build a house, a zendo, a hut to practice meditation. We adopt some rules and etiquette and keep the place going. It may be not necessary, but it is a good help in the practice.

Sometimes we build a house, a zendo, a hut when we practice meditation. The only rules and etiquette is keeping the practice constant and steady. It may be not necessary, but it is a good help in the practice.

Every inhalation and every exhalation are stone blocks. They come in and out of your nose.

The house is built and destroyed in a moment. We build it up again and again until eventually it founds its foundation and it cannot be shaken anymore. From the outside it is small, almost invisible.

From the inside, it is boundless.

Weeds growing in the ceiling.

No study

2010-11-28T11:36:00.000-08:00

I have no time to study this days. Working in finding a work, working in developing my skills as a programmer, working in painting the bathroom, working in samsara.

I say I have no time to study and no time to practice. So when I sit, I'm worried. When I paint, I'm thinking I'd like to be "practising".

Then it happens again. Almost like a patient and compasive friend patting you softly in the back, as to wake you up: I can see the brush in my hand, my hand is white and moving up and down by the wall. There is this quality in the light, I AM PRACTICING. The wall is a book, the chair I'm standing on is my cushion, the bottom of the bucket is my teacher and he asks: "what is your practice?" And my hand answers, up and down, left and right, up and down.

Later, going for a walk, hard walk on the new snow, my nose says thanks to the cold, my chins cry in joy. The bent old tree asks again: "what is your practice?" I turn my head, three swans flying by, and I know I'm practicing, the swans can testify it.

I come home, wonderfully warm, I pick up the Dhammapada because I'm thirsty, as if had been to long away from my lover and I needed a kiss. I open the little book and read:

Those who awaken
Never rest in one place
Like swans they rise,
and leave the lake

Maybe there is no study, but there is practice

All the time

Words in Dokusan

2010-11-19T13:56:00.000-08:00

“What books on Buddhism should I read?”
“All of them.”
“No really, which ones specifically?”
“None of them.”

Zen is the path of direct experience and to me this includes the direct experience of the copious writings beginning with the sutras. Those many times when I was practicing in solitude; books brought me the words of the Buddha as well as the countless teachings that have come since.

It is said that Zen is "not founded on words and letters” but this does not mean avoiding words and letters. If this were true, Zen would be a totally silent practice without dharma talks, gathas, koans, dokusan or sanzen. All of which are dependent on words. Who among us today would have come to Zen if we had never read anything about it?

I think I like Chuang-Tzu’s perspective on this-

The purpose of a fishtrap is to catch fish, and when the fish are caught, the trap is forgotten.
The purpose of a rabbit snare is to catch rabbits. When the rabbits are caught, the snare is forgotten.
The purpose of words is to convey ideas. When the ideas are grasped, the words are forgotten.

Where can I find a man who has forgotten words?
I would like to have a talk with him!

Friends of the Way

2010-11-08T12:56:00.000-08:00

During my ordination ceremony so many things happened that I could barely follow what was going on. Five days later, I dare to have a look at the presents I received that day. Among them I found this poem.

I’ve always loved friends of the Way
Friends of the Way I’ve always held dear
Meeting a traveler with a silent spring
Or greeting a guest talking Zen
Talking of the unseen on a moonlit night
Searching for the Truth until dawn
When ten thousand reasons disappear
And we finally see who we are
Cold Mountain

Well, it actually says it all.

Words to live by

2010-10-11T20:42:00.000-07:00

Ain't no rhyme or reason,
No complicated meaning,
Ain't no need to over think it -
Let go laughing

Life don't go quite like you planned it,
We try so hard to understand it,
Irrefutable, indisputable
The fact is - It happens

With thanks to Kristian Bush, Jennifer Nettles, and Bobby Pinson

Autumn

2010-10-03T04:26:00.000-07:00

It seems it is easier to contemplate impermanence these days.
I rest in the breath. Believing I lack concentration I turn my attention to the breathing-body process.
Something is lacking and soon I'm diving in and out the teachings of the Daodejing.
Take a backward step. The last factors of anapanasati are the gate to Silent Illumination.
Fading away: the need to provide an answer to an uncertain future, or to post a blog comment.
Cessation: attachments, words, needs, explanations, the wanting to be this and not wanting to be that.
Relinquishment: every instant is new, starting afresh, not concluded, not conditioned.
Then, back in the world, acting, speaking, moving.

Wind, old leaves in the trees become inocent children chasing each other, indifferent to external conditions.
And that light...

Medicine

2010-09-24T09:55:00.000-07:00

The Buddha taught a method for keeping stress out of our lives. Until the summer my job and home life was laden with such stress, so I practised a lot, and hey, it worked - potential stress was often nipped in the bud and present stress was generally dissolved. I was less stressed when I remembered to practise than when I did not. Result!

But here's my dilemma. My home life has become easier, owing to a change in my wife's professional situation, and my own job has recently improved, owing to a little down-shifting I arranged - so in my life as a whole, much less stress arises. Feeling thus healthier, I am taking my Zen "medicine" less regularly. Yet I still think of myself as a Buddhist, and Buddhists practise regularly, right?

Ok, everything changes, so these good times cannot last. I know that. But in the meantime, what should a Buddhist do when his life is going well?

Walk On!

2010-09-14T08:30:00.000-07:00

I remember a scene from an old Popeye cartoon, back when they made feature length cartoon for the theaters (15-30 minutes). In this scene, Popeye was chasing a mysterious creature that started up some stairs that were simply floating in the sky.

Going up the stairs Popeye noticed that as he went to the next stair the stair he just stepped from had vanished. He was now high in the air and there was no turning back, even the stair he was on was dissolving, his only choice was to move forward.

This is the nature of time, there is only the step you are standing on (which is dissolving) and the next one you will take, everything else is an illusion.

We cannot go back, nor can we stand still, our only choice is to take the next step.

Fun

2010-08-25T10:35:00.000-07:00

Is Zen supposed to be fun?

Anger

2010-07-23T10:56:00.000-07:00

How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it?--Marcus Aurelius

So much of our suffering is generated by our own anger. Not just the anger of rage, but the slow simmering anger generated by jealousy, resentment, aggravation and judgment. Anger is purely a product of the mind, no one makes you angry, it is all your own. What purpose does it serve to be angry?

Letting go of anger, how simple it is to free ourselves of so much suffering.

To master our anger is to master our lives.

“Anger will never disappear so long as thoughts of resentment are cherished in the mind. Anger will disappear just as soon as thoughts of resentment are forgotten.”
--Siddhartha Gautama

Life

2010-07-02T11:30:00.000-07:00

My wife asked me an interesting question the other day - "How does your Zen practice affect your real life?"

Putting aside any Zennish navel-gazing about the meaning of "real" - I think we all know what she meant by the word - it is a fundamental question. No point doing it unless it has some positive affect.

To be honest, she asked because my job has been difficult for a while and so I've very much not been floating around smiling serenely like the Dalai Lama. Thus the only honest answer I could give was, "It makes me less of an arse than I would be without it."

What about you? How does your Zen practice affect your real life?

Who is Your Master?

2010-06-25T09:20:00.000-07:00

Who is your master?
Who makes you suffer the torment of the world?
Who has imprisoned you with their thoughts or words?
Who is Mara and why does he sit under the Bodhi Tree?

What is a Buddha?

2010-06-14T23:20:00.000-07:00

A question has arisen in a koan exchange in which I've been participating. It's a question I've asked without necessarily knowing the answer! I'd be interested in what you people think - and so, doubtless, would be my koan combat partner! Here it is:-

If I let go of perfection, am I a Buddha?

Practice as an Attachment

2010-06-11T07:15:00.001-07:00

My spiritual journey has been a very diverse endeavor. I remember when I decided to return to practicing Zen beyond just zazen, I searched for a sangha in my local community and found a Zen center. I was thrilled and contacted them right away. I was informed I would need to attend a mandatory class before I would be able to attend and sit with the group. Thinking that was for people unfamiliar with zazen, I let them know I had been practicing meditation for a minimum of 20 years. “It doesn’t matter. You have to come to the class, and we aren’t doing another class for a couple of months.” I wondered what could be so incredibly critical about sitting as to require such deep instruction. Had I crossed into the Twilight Zone of Buddhism? I wondered. Through the years I have heard similar stories from many frustrated zenners. “I was so panicked about making sure I was doing everything just right that I couldn’t meditate!”

I also remember the time when I was doing my chaplain training in a hospital in central Texas and was called for a “Buddhist consult.” It turned out to be a pregnant woman who was about to have a C-section. She was concerned because of the precept that “forbids clouding one’s mind,” and she was concerned that she would be “violating the precept” if she allowed herself to receive spinal anesthesia.

An attachment is more than an addiction, more than an unhealthy connection. It is anything that inhibits our growth and progression. When one is more concerned about bowing correctly, if they’ve faced the correct direction, if they’re in the correct order of entry than they are about being fully immersed in the moment, in zazen or kinhin, than I would call that an attachment. Something the Bible summed up nicely as choking on gnats.

There can be too much of an attachment to the cultural trappings of the practice of Buddhism. The Buddha, before his enlightenment, shaved his head as a symbol of releasing himself from worldliness and attachments. Today some question why a monk doesn’t shave their head. Some quibble that we are “watering Zen down” when someone dares wear a robe of a color other than black. Others are so firmly attached to the concepts of lineage and dharma heirdom that they lose sight of the key components of Buddhist practice: Compassion and wisdom.

When Siddhartha Gautama sat beneath the bodhi tree, I highly doubt he worried about if he bowed to the earth appropriately. He extricated himself from all that he possibly could and opened himself to this breath, this second, until he discovered how to unshackle all sentient beings from suffering. If we look at the Eightfold Noble Path, we do not find instructions on the incense ceremony, on prostrations, on the correct pattern for walking into the dojo. Practices, ceremonies, etc., are tools. They can help us focus, help us settle into a special space, but when we place them above or equal to all other things, we tighten that which binds us to samsara. This moment, this breath. This is truly all that matters.

Ishu Kinshu

Doubt

2010-06-06T08:11:00.000-07:00

Harry has asked if someone with Dojin Roku posting rights can post a question on his behalf. As he's just agreed to give the dharma talk in our winter sesshin - if you're in England on December 19th, feel free to join us! - I do owe him one, so here's his question:

What is the place of DOUBT in Buddhist practice?

If it was good enough for Him...

2010-06-01T09:32:00.000-07:00

Master,

The Buddha left his wife and son in order to search for enlightenment.
I have a wife and son. Should I do likewise?

What does Zen teach about God?

2010-05-27T19:47:00.001-07:00

I get asked this question a LOT, along with "Do you believe in God?"

Zen is the art of being totally immersed in the moment. This second, this breath is all we have. Everything else is illusion. In Zen we attempt to strip away all the fluff, all the unnecessary wrappings that hold us back from full awakening. So what many will call my overly simplistic response is: "We don't worry about things like that." If you knew for a matter of fact, with every cell of your body that God did not exist, would you change the way you live? So far everyone I have asked have said no. Then? The Buddha taught that all sentient beings have everything they need within them. When we seek externally, we hold ourselves back.

Developing compassion to the point where all our thoughts, deeds, actions, our very essence are ruled by compassion and wisdom is the utmost expression of our buddha nature. So I would say if someone's answer to the question above was "Yes," they have more work for the cushion, and that it is more important than the other existential questions we can become bogged down with.

Ishu Kinshu

Finding a standpoint

2010-05-25T12:21:00.000-07:00

I was talking to a dharma friend today. She guessed we were almost in the same standpoint regarding buddhism.

I immediately asked myself where my standplace was. When I first contacted the Boundless Way school I was making a slow attempt of transition from theravada to chan/zen. I didn't know if I would succeed and through this time I've been strongly based on the teachings of the Pali Canon. With time I've learnt to discuss, question and defend certain viewpoints, creating in this way a kind of identity, which as with all sense of identity is subject to decay and death.

Some place in the process I feel like I lost contact with something essential. Something I can only get in contact through abandoning what I've learnt, what I have, what I am... standing alone, naked and in silence, shading light into it until it reveals itself, wandering along, finding no standpoint, just as leaves do not say "my true nature is green" or "my true nature is yellow" in this boundless empty field.

It has nothing to do with buddhism or any other -ism. Becoming proficient in defending a certain view has nothing to do with it either. If it had, it would be like setting boundaries to the boundless. It cannot be done, no matter how hard one tries.

Seeking a home, seeking a refuge I was worried about where my standpoint was and thus my mouth was dry like a desert. My feet treading the boundless way, the sky as the limits of my head, where could worry find a standpoint?

Do not squander your life!

2010-05-20T11:49:00.000-07:00

To end our evening practice at Open Gate,
we recite the following gatha:

Let me respectfully remind you,
Life and death are of supreme importance,
Time passes swiftly and opportunity is lost.
Each of us should strive to awaken,
Awaken, take heed! Do not squander your life.

What exactly does it mean to awaken?
How do we know when we are awakened?
How do we know when someone else is awakened?
Despite all our years of practice;
If we never see ourselves as being awakened,
have we simply "squandered" our lives?

Karmic Ripples

2010-05-12T22:28:00.000-07:00

Someone who came to zazen last night said something that has bearing on the last post about service - and also on the debate we had some months ago about missionary activity.

To recap that debate, some thought you should meditate lots yourself so you become deeply fine and that this would both set an example to others and make one better company for the rest of the planet; others (a minority on this blog) felt part of the Bodhisattva path lay in sharing those techniques with anyone who showed even the slightest willingness to listen. Spiritual hermits v Buddha's Witnesses.

Last night a lady came to meditate who hadn't sat with the group for three years. Three years ago I put on my Buddha's Witnesses hat and did a leaflet drop of the neighbourhood. She took a zazen lesson, sat a couple of times with the group, then disappeared. A-ha! Kaishin clearly a rubbish meditation teacher! He should not be teaching but still should be sitting on his own, perfecting himself!

Yeah, true about me not being up there with the Dalai Lama. BUT...
What happened is she met at zazen a vipassaana practitioner, who gave her a leaflet. Now, despite my limitations as a teacher, the taste she got of the fruits of meditation was enough to make her want more, so she took up the leaflet's offer of a free 10 day retreat. Three years on and she's been there more than once and meditation is the rock upon which her life is founded.

So you don't have to be able to levitate before you teach people to meditate. Clearly I have flaws as a teacher and/or zendo leader, or she'd have stayed with "my" group. However, the karmic fruit of introducing her to the meditation scene was very great. Just think - if I'd been terribly modest and NOT posted those "come and learn" leaflets, if I'd worried whether I was yet perfect enough - that positive change in her life wouldn't have happened.

So if you're not dipping your toe in the lake for fear you're not pure enough, think about the wonderful karmic ripples you could be setting in motion...but are not.

At your service . . .

2010-05-08T08:06:00.000-07:00

"We must be the change we wish to see in the world"

-Gandhi

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.

-Margaret Mead

Many Buddhists are under the impression that they are making the world a better place through their Buddhist practice. If these people were formerly spending their time looting, raping, and pillaging, and their practice has helped them to stop doing these things, then they are right. Otherwise, their practice is, in all likelihood, only helping to maintain the status quo. But keeping the world from becoming a worse place is not the same thing as making it a better place.

While using Buddhist practice to calm and center yourself is a good place to start, truly improving the world requires moving beyond the meditation cushion, beyond the zendo or temple, and actively engaging in a life of service. The Buddha himself recognized this when, after his enlightenment, he passed up the chance to live a peaceful, reclusive life and decided instead to spread peace by helping others to wake up as well. He spent the bulk of his life in service as a teacher, counselor, and advisor, and the fruits of this service are still evident 2600 years later.

So, I challenge you to serve. Move beyond the mere intellectual understanding that we are all connected into an active realization of this fact. Pick up trash in the streets and parks. Buy a homeless person a meal. Teach meditation to prisoners. The possibilities are endless - but you have to start somewhere. In time, you may even find that an hour of service can be a more effective practice than 10 hours spent in meditation.

Be the change.

What will you do?

Gutei's Finger

2010-04-23T23:05:00.000-07:00

There's a koan I've been struggling with - and I'm struggling with it not for the first time, either! I do some koan exchange, so I know I'm not the only person who finds this one rather challenging. I'd thus be grateful if as many of you as possible could suggest what you think we're supposed to learn from the koan of Gutei's finger. Here's the koan:

Gutei raised his finger whenever he was asked a question about Zen. A boy attendant began to imitate him in this way. When anyone asked the boy what his master had preached about, the boy would raise his finger.

Gutei heard about the boy's mischief. He seized him and cut off his finger. The boy cried and ran away. Gutei called and stopped him. When the boy turned his head to Gutei, Gutei raised up his own finger. In that instant the boy was enlightened.

When Gutei was about to pass from this world he gathered his monks around him. `I attained my finger-Zen,' he said, `from my teacher Tenryu, and in my whole life I could not exhaust it.' Then he passed away.

So please tell me - what's that all about?

First there is a Mountain, then there is No Mountain, then there is…

2010-04-12T21:41:00.000-07:00

A couple posts back, I quoted the Dharmapada and asked if anyone actually believed that we create the world with our thoughts. I was surprised when the only response was a cleaver “set up” from Kaishin, whereby he introduced a scenario where he would be struck in the head by a meteorite. Was this meteorite his doing? Or was being struck in the head just his Karma for being such a smart-aleck?

But since that time this whole issue has arisen under a completely different posting and under another topic, Karma. Harry and I have had some wonderful commentary bouncing back and forth and I realized that this is just too heady of a subject to not be resurrected.

According to the Dharmapada the Buddha stated:

“We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.”

Did the Buddha actually mean that we create the world with our thoughts? Or was he just speaking metaphorically? Do our thoughts actually manifest physically in the world? Even those we do not act upon? What about volition? Can we plead not guilty, just because we meant no harm? And what does this have to do with Karma?

A Hard Question

2010-04-07T14:48:00.001-07:00

This dilapidated man sits with his cardboard sign on the edge of a busy corner. Dirt and rain and car exhaust all in a dark marbled pattern on his face, his beard a matted mess. I find I can never avoid making eye contact with these folks, year in and year out, this country and in others - Spain and Ecuador, India and China, Bolivia, Peru.... And in eye contact there is connection, always. And then my unknowing and hesitation, questions about my being in relation to theirs, my action in relation to their being.

This being human is complicated sometimes.

Bodhisattva,

What is right speech?

What is right action?

A Simple Question

2010-03-25T23:37:00.000-07:00

It's a small question, but it'll be interesting to see the range of replies. References to flax and plum trees are forbidden. So, to you,

What is Zen?

The temple bell echoes across the valley

2010-02-24T13:07:00.000-08:00

I received the task of listening to the echoes of the temple bell. Difficult when there is no valley here, and no bell either. But I sit down and listen.

Listening, sounds appear, perception is refined. Listening changes as so do echoes: there is the humming of the heating system; or my daughter breathing deeply as she falls asleep; or a passing car out there in the far distance; or the church bell...

What is the source of these sounds?

The listened is seen.

Not with the eyes.

Without warning, not predicting it, another temple bell echoes across the valley: the breathing process. This is not heard, but rather felt. Breathing in and out is the bell echoing; the body is the valley. The echoing is seen moving up and down the valley, in and out, deeper and deeper.

The body is the bell

struck by the breathing

its sound is totally empty

But, what is the source of this sound?

There is only one bell in the temple. It fills the whole universe. It sounds, vibrates and echoes in itself: heating system, breathing in and out, daughter sleeping, body feeling, passing car... all this just echoing across the valley, which is a bell, echoing across the valley, which...

what is the source of this sound?

The emperor stays in palace.

The general goes beyond the frontiers.

---

The picture is borrowed from The Boundless Mind Zen website

Who do you think you are?

2010-02-19T08:31:00.000-08:00

“We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.”
The Dharmapada

As advanced as our science becomes and as far as we have come spiritually, we still do not believe that we create our own existence. Many of us will admit that we create our current circumstances, while others will admit that our perception of reality is the only reality we really know. But who among us has come to totally believe that our thoughts actually create the world?

Duality is what keeps us from seeing this clearly, there is me and there is what is not me. I am a product of circumstances beyond my control. These thoughts are all generations of the dualistic mind, the mind that does not recognize the perceived and perceiver as one. Our eyes and my eyes are one and the same, yet to nearly all, the world something we see outside of us.

Who do you think you are?

Who’s your teacher?

2010-02-07T15:32:00.000-08:00

Where’s your certificate?

What’s your lineage?

Are you qualified to transmit the dharma?

These questions are all too prevalent in Buddhism, and are usually asked by people who doubt or disagree with what you have to say. Unable or unwilling to trust their own judgment of whatever bits of information, wisdom, or foolishness you may have just offered, they want to know if someone else (your teacher or other certifying agency) agrees with what you say. If they have heard of this other person, or if you can sufficiently convince them of that person’s qualifications, then they may believe you and be willing to listen further. Why is this? Why are we so willing to disregard one teacher, then blindly trust another (to the point of exalting and deifying them), entirely on the basis of who did or didn’t sign their certificate? Why can’t we simply evaluate what they’ve said and trust our own insight and judgment as to its veracity?

This need for external verification of authority is most definitely not unique to Buddhism, though it is certainly antithetical to Buddhist teachings. And yet, many Buddhists formalize it, revere it and give it a special name: lineage. Rather than using our own personal experience and innate wisdom to decide if a person speaks true, we instead look to his teacher. And his teacher’s teacher. And his teacher’s teacher. And so on and on, until we come to the name of a teacher that we trust and recognize as an authority on the matter. How far back do we go - to Dogen? Rinzai? Bodhidharma? Buddha? Do we ask who the Buddha’s teacher was? Do we wonder who gave him the right and authority to teach? When the Buddha said “Be a light unto yourself”, I’m quite certain he didn’t add “so long as you can trace that light through an unbroken line of qualified teachers back to me.”

The mistake we make is in equating teachings (or wisdom) with authority, in the process also failing to recognize the very source of authority. The Buddha addresses this himself in the Kalama Sutra. He advises us not to blindly accept teachings, but to critically examine and experiment with them, accepting them finally only if they ring true for us based on our own experience and understanding. That is to say, authority comes from within, and we should grant this authority to the teachings of others only if they accord with our own innate wisdom. Thus does a teacher gain his authority – not from his teacher, but from his student; he is a teacher if and only if he has one or more students who think that there is truth in what he has to say.

When we realize this, we see that teachers are not the sources of our authority, but simply those who have gone before us, and that the purpose of lineage is not to grant them authority, but to preserve and transmit their teachings. In this sense, it doesn’t even matter if the lineage is unbroken, or if such-and-such a teacher was in that direct line. Recalling our geometry lessons from school, a line is defined by two points – no more, no less. Additional points may fall on the same line, but only two of them are needed for the line to exist. This means that as one point of the line, you are in direct lineage with any teacher from whom you learn. You are a direct descendant of Buddha, Jesus, Bodhidharma, Meister Eckhart, Rumi, the raven in the sky, the salmon in the stream, the mountain underfoot, and the neighbor across the street. You belong to as many lineages as there are teachers, and as the center point for all these lines connecting you to the teachers of the ages, you are a veritable sunburst – truly a light unto yourself.

Egolessness

2010-02-05T14:09:00.000-08:00

In buddhist circles it is usually said that we are trapped by our notions about ourselves.

Sometimes I think not-self is as dangerous as the self, we end up trapped by that notion too, almost making a thing of the ego, a devil to be fight and conquered, the subject of struggle, confussion and worry (because we deny to admit that we don't understand).

Whatever we make of the ego, it is not by creating more concepts that we awake or get liberated, but by abandoning completely concept creations. Can we do that? Or is it too much for our egos?

Let the ancient master speak:

Cast off completely your head and skin. Thoroughly withdraw from distinctions of light and shadow. Where the ten thousand changes do not reach is the foundation that even a thousand sages cannot transmit. Simply by yourself illuminate and deeply experience it with intimate accord. The original light flashes through confusion. True illumination reflects into the distance. Deliberations about being and nonbeing are entirely abandoned. The wonder appears before you, its benefit transferred out for kalpas. Immediately you follow conditions and accord with awakening without obstruction from any defilements. The mind does not attach to things, and your footsteps are not visible on the road. The you are called to continue the family business. Even if you thoroughly understand, still practice until it is familiar. (Hongzhi Zhengjue, 1091-1157)

Buddhist Missionaries

2010-01-30T08:21:00.000-08:00

We rarely hear of "Buddhist missionaries".

Do you think we should?

We Choose Our Suffering

2010-01-26T20:28:00.000-08:00

When we choose to enjoy excessive eating and fattening foods, we choose the suffering of being overweight and unhealthy.

When we choose to intoxicate ourselves with drugs and alcohol, we choose the suffering of hangovers, overdoses and organ damage.

When we choose to be strongly opinionated and judgmental of others, we choose the suffering of reciprocal judgment and loneliness.

When we choose actions that destroy our environment, we choose the suffering of pollution, species extinction and climate change.

When we choose to accept war and social injustice, we choose the suffering of sorrow and guilt.

When we choose to express ourselves through hateful speech, we choose the suffering of regret.

When we choose to love others, we inevitably choose the suffering of loss.

When we choose to dwell on the self, we choose the suffering of emptiness.

When we choose to ignore reality, we choose the suffering of our ignorance.

The old adage says- “Name Your Poison” and with every action that is exactly what we do. It seems that we must we decide between the “lesser of two evils” every time we make any choice. So, what is this to say about the nature of our suffering? Do we actually have a choice?

If this were poised to me as a multiple choice question, I would have to choose “All the above”

Is it too late to drop this class?

Abide in the Unborn

2010-01-15T02:42:00.000-08:00

I don't know why I came to remember Bankei's words.

Denmark is white all over. Snow takes in all sounds and we are forced to walk slowly and look around.

A Spanish translator reminded me of Laozi, retreating, losing, giving up, staying last and deepest, resting in the dao.

Abide in the Unborn

Just like water.
Liquid water.

Some people find a comfortable place; then they freeze, turn into ice and resist change. They know ice will melt down. The more one resists, the more painfull it will be.
And yet, rigth now, as water or ice, one rests on it, opening hands, giving one more step from the top of the 100 meter pole.
Every moment.

Craving & Parenthood

2010-01-09T23:48:00.000-08:00

"Life is filled with craving. Craving causes to stress. To eliminate stress, just eliminate craving. To eliminate craving..."

...do the stuff we do. Sit on a cushion. Wear black. If you like Confucius, get up-tight about oryoki, if you like Lao Tse, get non-dualistic about ritual - whatever does it for you. But eliminate craving.

It works for me as an individual - but not as a parent! To aid his life-long happiness I had to go through ten days of misery with my son recently - worth doing, but I needed a strong motivation to launch into such a painful process.

Craving is a great motivator! So, because I craved his long-term welfare, we went through the process, it was horrid, but life's better now and I suspect lots of lumps of suffering have been erased from his future. I only did it because craving made me. Clearly craving eliminates suffering!

Seems a bit of a paradox here. For the Zen practitioner, eliminating craving really does make life better: but as a parent, can one do without it?

Is this the big difference between Zen and Theravada?
Theravada: "Eliminate craving."
Zen: "Seek Right Action. And sometimes craving is Right Action."

What do you guys think? Extra cred points awarded to the opinions of anyone who confesses to being a parent!

Ask Bodhidharma

2010-01-09T13:21:00.000-08:00

Dear Bodhidharma,

I am a dedicated zen practitioner who enjoys attending meditation retreats at my local zen center. While I enjoy these retreats, I don't feel that we spend enough time in silent, seated meditation. So during a work period at the last retreat, I asked the teacher "Why do we spend so much time working? Shouldn't we spend more time practicing zen?" He laughed so hard that he dropped his rake!

I don't get it - what was so funny?

Sincerely,

A Confused Practitioner

Sewing the Buddha's Robe

2010-01-06T04:29:00.000-08:00

My lengthy solo attempt to make a kesa has ended.

"Solo" as in sewing unsupported, without oxygen.
"Attempt" as in Scott's "attempt" to reach the South Pole.

So, it was difficult and ended in failure. Let me talk you through it so that you may find it easier if you decide to have a go.

I don't really mind having failed as this was largely a philosophical exercise - when would I wear a kesa? The philosophical aspect was my attempt to sew within the spirit of the original kesas, garments made from discarded cloth. My kesa would be patchwork not because Dogen said the "official" pattern looked like rice fields: my kesa would be patchwork simply because if you make a large garment from discarded material, patchwork is the only way to do it.

Thus I found discarded materials - a worn out hockey shirt and a couple of pairs of trousers which seemed both to have shrunk about the waistband at the same time in my life. (Washing machine operating too hot?) With the help of a basic pattern - it's on the right-hand side of the blog - I got cracking.

There are two mistakes from which I feel you could learn.

Firstly, if you don't yet know how to sew seams, don't learn as you go along. My last seams looked excellent, very pro: sadly the rest were awful and thus have a grotty, frayed appearance. I discovered the important thing was to fold the seam over a couple of times until the edges of both bits of fabric are safely tucked away. Ok, ok, I know that's obvious to those of you who already know how to sew!

Secondly, home dying is really hard. The only way to get a consistent colour is to make your whole kesa from the same material. Now, this gets philosophically tricky as the whole point is to use discarded material, so going out and buying a roll of fabric is not quite in the vibe. Next time I do it, I'll go to the "thrift store" (I think that's what you call charity shops in America) and buy a discarded curtain, preferably a brown one to save the necessity of any dying at all. You'll then have to decide what you think was the real point behind the patchwork effect, and leave the cloth intact or cut up and reassemble according to your philosophy of kesa manufacure.

My rectangle of fraying, multicoloured cloth won't go to waste - there's thick snow over here and our zendo has neither heating nor insulation, so I'll be wrapped up in it for tonight's group meditation session, when the "mood" lighting (candles) will not reveal quite what a hobo I look. However, if you wish to make an item which you can wear in public, in daylight, then please bear in mind what I have learnt about material and seams.

Gassho

what is this we do?

2010-01-03T11:48:00.001-08:00

When we do any one thing, be aware of that one thing, placing your full attention within it. When we do any one thing, we ask why we do it, evaluating in full consciousness our actions and our words.

So then I have to wonder, what is this that we do in meditation?

Can 'sitting,' in a seated meditation, be just that simple? One just sits, breathing and following the breath, totally silent? And that's it? Did the Buddha really reach enlightenment doing something so utterly simple? So simple and yet, why is something so simple also, at times, so hard?

Sometimes I sit and beautiful things unfold in a singular consciousness, a timeless space awash in ephemeral mystery that rises and falls with each breath. Most times I sit and grapple with circular thoughts of past and future -- What did I do the day before last and how would I do it differently, and what do I have to do this afternoon? What did they mean when they said that to me? Or were they intending something else? And then remembering, returning back to my breath, wondering again how this simple practice of 'sitting' could be so difficult?

The mind is a three ring circus event - three shows all at once, with trapeze artists flying high above, and clowns below throwing candy to the crowd.

So there is more to 'sitting' than just simply sitting - this much is obvious. If it were to be called a 'skill,' then it is something that must be practiced and honed over time. This practice continually evolves and changes, as subtle as that would be, for I still just sit! And for this reason I keep returning to the cushion, breathing softly, tethering the attention to the in and out of my breath, the rise and fall of my abdomen....

After retreat

2010-01-02T11:08:00.000-08:00

There was a ghost in the house but only when I thought of him. So I hid his name and picture and he didn't annoy me anymore.

Usually ghosts are only there when we think of them, when we give them power to scare us or worry us.

Apart from ghosts, there was snow, wind, rain and sun. Quietness, silence and work being done, work being done.

A lot of questions to make, another way to get out, to wanting to get out. But when staying with the question, no one there to answer it, no place to hide... what do you do?

The silent retreat ended. Another one started: the retreat of daily life. What's more important?

Whisky can be Zen

2009-12-27T12:33:00.000-08:00

I love decent whisky, but normally can't justify the extortionate expenditure when the world has greater priorities. However, a couple of weeks ago I helped at a charity auction where all the funds raised were going to needy children. A half case of whisky came up - the best, from the private bottlings of the Chairman of the Bruichladdich distillery, home of Lagavulin.

So I won the auction with a bid of £500. My wife was very understanding.

Two days ago I allowed a couple of friends to help me open the first two bottles. We had a pleasant time - but the conversation was interrupted by the whisky and the whisky was interrupted by the conversation. Neither were satisfactory - yet this was the very best whisky, and when I have the same two chaps round for conversation, we converse well.

Tonight I sat alone and tried again. My son was asleep, my wife in the bath - just me and the whisky, and silence.

The experience is as impossible to describe as the inner experience of zazen - that is why food critics and Zen manuals both resort to apparently meaningless strings of words .

However, if you've done Zen, then you'll understand when I say that the whisky tasting involved one-pointed mind. What a joy! And what a contrast to the previous attempt at the same experience!

Zen is doing one thing, whole-heartedly, at one time.

(I would like to assure readers that no precepts were broken in the writing of this blog - at over US$100 per bottle, I can't afford to get heedless.)

Now

2009-12-22T12:27:00.000-08:00

Leaving tomorrow for retreat. Am I ready? Is there anything I have to do before departing? If I had more time to order this and that...

Is this what I'll say to aging, illness and death whenever they come? "Excuse me, would you give me five minutes" or "Could you come next month, I have no time right now"?

No, I won't say this.

Retreat is now.

Are you ready for now?

The One Turning

2009-12-17T19:50:00.000-08:00

Gasses compressing under their own weight become stars which ultimately explode forming the cosmic dust that condenses into planets.

Amorphous goo mutates into protoplasm that endlessly self consumes in an unbroken chain of ever changing life forms.

The caterpillar morphs into the butterfly just as the protosimian evolves into the human being. What was once one thing simply transmutes into another.

All beginnings spring from terminal remains in a rhythmic continuum, endlessly converting each imagined ending into something new.

The birth of a child seems to us to be nothing like the spontaneous ignition of a new born star, but these are all aspects of one continuous event, the one turning we call the universe.

Contrary to what we perceive as disjoined pieces of an enormous puzzle, the whole universe is woven together like a sweater knitted from a single yarn.

What is the meaning of this?

effortless effort

2009-12-16T12:12:00.000-08:00

Look at the way the trees move,

effortless effort,

and then arriving...

may this be my model.

Koan

2009-12-15T11:39:00.000-08:00

Two monks are admiring earthenware tea bowls. The first monk hands a bowl to the second, saying "I like this bowl - I can see the Buddha in its shiny glaze". After gazing intently at the bowl, the second one says "Really? All I can see is my reflection . . ."

See, though without eyes;

2009-12-14T17:39:00.000-08:00

There is vast distance between a thought

and the space that exists around it.

Does a tree concern itself as it grows green, lush in the warm spring air?

Does a bird doubt the beauty of the nest it builds?

Set your worries to the side to rest.

See, though without eyes;

the simplicity around us shows us the path to touch eternity.

Samu

2009-12-14T13:43:00.000-08:00

Fifty weeks waiting for my retreat.

It's coming soon.

This one will be short because we bought a house that has to undergo some renovations. I'm working there 7 days a week.

But not all is expectation, waiting (this is just another passing cloud). Working 7 days a week also means the work and, helping in that (the work during the work) here is a passage by Man-An:

You should not slack off for an instant. Alerting your vital spirit as your breathe out and in, watching your step as you walk forth and back, be as if you were galloping on a single horse into an opposing army of a million troops, armed with a single sword. As long as our concentration is not purely singleminded in both activity and stillness, it will be hard to attain even a little accord. Concentration of right mindfulness should be cultivated most especially in the midst of activity. You need not necessarily prefer stillness.

Not preferring, coming home, sitting down.

Keep working

Practice or Retreat?

2009-12-13T19:03:00.000-08:00

During intensive meditation retreats, we practice. We practice sitting without perusing the television or internet. We practice eating without wasting the smallest morsel. We practice walking without music or a cell phone blaring in our ear. We practice a simplified daily routine, happily dedicating ourselves to the most mundane tasks, instead of ignoring them.

When the retreat is over, do we apply this practice to our lives? Or do we jump right back into the fray, doing the very things we just spent two days (or weeks) trying not to do? While these things aren't all inherently bad (especially in moderation), if we spend the next fifty weeks looking forward to escaping them at the next retreat, perhaps we've missed the point.

Are we practicing for life, or retreating from it?

To Kill the Buddha

2009-12-13T07:57:00.001-08:00

When the famous Tea Master Sen-no Riku was to commit ritual suicide he wrote in his death poem: "With this sword I kill all Buddhas and Patriarchs!" as an admonishment to his preconceived notions of enlightenment. Only at his death did he openly admit that what had kept him from realizing himself as Buddha was his conceptualizations of what a Buddha was. Any image of the Buddha that is not our self as Buddha is a mistaken image, an idol in any form is an obstruction to our awakening.

This includes anyone who we feel is in some way superior to us. By elevating others we submit ourselves to another form of enslavement. This is not to say that we shouldn’t respect others, their positions or their accomplishments, but we should not see their knowledge or status as anything superior to our own. The notion of superiority is concept that limits both parties. Those who feel superior have defined themselves by the limits of others and those who feel inferior have limited themselves through self imposed restrictions.

One only needs to understand that everyone is a manifestation of Buddha consciousness, I am Buddha consciousness, you are Buddha consciousness, we are Buddha consciousness. Superiority and inferiority are limiting concepts that have no bearing on Buddha consciousness and therefore no bearing on anything real. To kill the Buddha is to annihilate even the most cherished of concepts- ideals, these are among the last barriers to awakening.

Beware Buddha!

2009-12-11T10:28:00.000-08:00

If you see the Buddha, kill him!

There is danger in Zen - the danger of being trapped by non-duality.
Sometimes be Great Mind. Sometimes be an individual.

Live the moment to the full, whoever it demands.

become a raindrop in the ocean

2009-12-09T20:33:00.000-08:00

The moment a raindrop touches the ocean it becomes the ocean, without hesitation the ocean and raindrop each accept becoming one, to awaken to our Buddha consciousness is exactly like this. What appears at one moment to be the consciousness of the individual is suddenly recognized as boundless ocean of consciousness, all perception of separate identity is instantly lost to the realization of universal awareness, the boundless Buddha Mind.

When we break through the barriers of conceptual thinking we have awakened to our Buddha Consciousness, this is not something achieved but rather something realized. Just like our eyes, our mind cannot see when it is closed. To become Buddha is to awaken, all we need do is open our minds and allow the ocean of consciousness to flow in.

We may think we see things as they are, but the diaphanous constructs of our ego centric identity become barriers as impenetrable as concrete walls. As long as we believe that we are separate, we have imprisoned ourselves. We become like a sealed bottle of water floating in the ocean, wondering why we feel trapped. Those of us who have not awakened are not alone in this delusion, most of humanity is likewise bottled up and bobbing about helplessly in an ocean of desolation.

Conceptual thinking is the barrier. To conceptualize is to interpret what we experience and make conclusions, which by definition are endings. Every concept is a portion separated from the whole by the conclusions that frame it, artificially bound by what we define as its limits. Without conceptual thinking everything returns to its original state which is boundless and complete. The awakened mind sees everything as it is, without concepts, without boundaries. By letting go of our self imposed boundaries we allow our minds to become boundless and our self identification becomes unlimited.

Those who identify with boundless awareness perceive the non-duality of reality and recognize themselves and all of nature as both singular and omnipresent, individual yet undifferentiated from the whole of existence. This is the root of mystical awareness and the Mystic is recognized by this identification. Unfettered by the gossamer tethers of conceptual thinking the Mystic awakens to boundless Buddha Mind and is set free.

do jhana

2009-12-09T14:06:00.000-08:00

"Over there are the roots of trees; over there, empty dwellings. Practice jhana, monks. Don't be heedless. Don't later fall into regret. This is our message to you." Master Gotama

Practice jhana, do jhana, do dhyana, do chan, do zen, meditate, do the work, stop doing, penetrate, abandon, come back again and again...

Persist. Awake!

When I want to know what the Buddha taught, I go to the suttas. When I want to know what the Buddha is, I go to Linji. When I ask for directions, I go to Sengcan. When I sit, I enter the realm of silent illumination and the boundless mind opens by itself responding appropriately in every situation.

If responding to situations is not appropriate then I go back and start again.

Breath in. Breath out.

the great way is gateless

2009-12-02T17:38:00.000-08:00

The Great Way is gateless, approached by a thousand paths.
Pass trough this barrier, you walk freely in the universe.
Mumonkan

It is through Zen practice that we approach the gateless gate of our own self restricted minds. Every one of us is capable of accessing the boundless mind and passing freely through the mental barriers created by our fears and preconceptions. By letting go of our preconceptions, dualistic thinking and communal delusions, we discover the previously unrealized potential of our own unlimited consciousness and become self liberated. This is the fundamental tenet of Zen.

The Dojin Roku, translated into English as The Wayfarers Record, is a collection of thoughts, observations and shared teachings as presented by the Dojin, or Wayfarers, of the Boundless Mind Zen School. The purpose of this journal is to connect like minded individuals who understand their Zen practice to be a continuing journey beyond standardized Zen practices and independent of sectarian differences.

As of this writing, the Wayfarers of the Boundless Mind Zen School are in five countries and three continents and include individuals from various lineages and traditions who have come to find that the philosophy and practices of Boundless Mind Zen resonate with their own understanding of Zen. It is our intention to make these various thoughts, observations and teachings open to the world as part of the direct and free transmission of the Dharma.