Saturday, January 2, 2010

After retreat

There was a ghost in the house but only when I thought of him. So I hid his name and picture and he didn't annoy me anymore.
Usually ghosts are only there when we think of them, when we give them power to scare us or worry us.
Apart from ghosts, there was snow, wind, rain and sun. Quietness, silence and work being done, work being done.
A lot of questions to make, another way to get out, to wanting to get out. But when staying with the question, no one there to answer it, no place to hide... what do you do?
The silent retreat ended. Another one started: the retreat of daily life. What's more important?


  1. These ghosts are many; some long dead but most are among the walking. They seem to come out most frequently when we are in solitude. Those we wished we had talked to differently, those who we had unintentionally mistreated, those who depended on us, that we somehow let down. It seems that there is an endless line of ghosts waiting to haunt us.
    I once had a young woman come to me and explain to me that she was dying and wanted to talk with me about death. She had come to the door just as I was leaving to go meet some friends at a festive event. I gave her my card and instructed her to call me and I would be glad to meet with her at another time. I never heard from her again. When I am alone, I see her face in my mind’s eye and try to invite her in, but she no longer has time for me.

  2. I have a tendency to blame myself for past actions, including those people whom I could have treated better. Attachment to this blame is of no good, so every time that I see it, I try to let it go, and remember "what's done, it's done".Next time, perhaps, I'll do better. I'm not perfect, so there's no point in trying to pretend I am.